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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
ben-lyintous

the signs as 50 shades of grey quotes

koi-strology

Aries: “Welcome,” he said, shoving my hair hard, “to the butt room.”

Taurus: “No way,” I cried out orgasmically. “No way, no way, no way.”

Gemini: “When I woke up Christian Grey had somehow gotten an entire orange into my mouth.”

Cancer: “Say it,” he commanded. “Yankity Spankity.” “Louder.”

Leo: “He gently handcuffed me to the parking meter. “Bye.”

Virgo: “The helicopter was built for sex, I observed sexily. You could lie across the seats or recline them.”

Libra: “Christian Grey picked up the long black thing and started working my zone. It was bananas.”

Scorpio: “The sex feelings flooded my body like a charging herd of itty, bitty elephants. We’re talking small.”

Sagittarius: “Do I afraid you?” Christian Grey asked, licking his eyebrow.”

Capricorn: “It’s a Murphy Bed,” he explained. “Maybe one day we could leave it up and have sex in the walls.”

Aquarius: “Christian Grey mashed on my area with the meat of his hand. “Do you like that, you woman?”

Pisces: “Hey,” I asked “Didn’t you used to be a vampire?”

Source: [x]

clesktop

THERE IS NO WAY ANY OF THESE ARE REAL IM SO MAD

usobuki

these are actually real that’s honestly just how bad the book is

thingsalike

is “to the butt room” supposed to be like the bat cave bc if so I have to leave.

my exact texts to my friends while watching s1 ep3 of Scream:

“BROOKES DEAD AF”

“I KNOW YOU THINK ITS SEXY TIME WITH YO TEACH BUT ITS NOT”

“LIKE UNKNOWN NUMBER CALLS YOU AFFER THE CONVERSATION THEY JUST HAD BAOUT THAT SKDJIS”

“BROOKE IS SAFE”

“BUT THE NCIE INE ISNT”

“WTF”

“WHY WOULD SHE ASK HIM NOT TO KILL BROOKE BUT THE NICE ONE SURE KILL THE GOOD ONE”

“YOU LITTLE FRICK”

“you put a blindfold on and cuff yourself to the bed..YOU BROUGHT THIS ON YOURSELF BROOKE”

“BUT RILEY AND THE NERD ARE SO CUTE”

“OH WAIT HIS NAME IS NOAH AH HE’S LIKE MYFAVORITE”

“I DIDNT EVEN KNOW HIS NAME LMAO HE BETTER NEVER DIE”

“I WOULD BE LIKE KILL BROOKE LOLOLOL”

“RILEY IM CRYING”

“IM SO UOSET”

“I GATE EVERUTHING”

“LIKE WHY THE FRICK IS EVERYTHING HAPPENINF ON THE THIRD DAMN EPISODE”

“ASS FUCK LITTLE BITCH”

“WELL WHAT DID YOU FUCKING EXPECT YOU STUPID LITTLE SHIT”

“"I CAN GET TO RILEY IN TIME” BITCH YOURE LIKE AN HOUR AWAY"

“TRY THE FUCK AGAIN”

“IM PISSED”

scream screamtvshow tvshows tv show